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An autoimmune disease is your body attacking itself from the inside.
What if your mind could do the same thing?
To switch the order this time, let’s break this down by first defining the disease.
An autoimmune disease occurs when your immune system attacks your body instead of defending it. If you have an autoimmune disease, your immune system is hyper-active: so even in the absence of bacteria or viruses, your immune system turns on your body and damages healthy tissue.
Although it seems like they shouldn’t be, autoimmune diseases are very common. Experts estimate that around 1 in 15 people in the U.S. have an autoimmune disease.
Autoimmune diseases are also chronic: if you have one, you will suffer its symptoms for the rest of your life.
Now, here’s why social comparison is like an autoimmune disease.
Comparison is different from other tendencies you might struggle with. It’s so persistent because it’s partially human nature. Psychologist Leon Festinger’s social comparison theory suggests that people have an innate need to evaluate themselves, making it almost irresistible to fall into social comparison. Like an autoimmune disease, comparison doesn’t really have a definite cause, but it can be intensified due to external factors: childhood and adulthood experiences.
When you compare yourself to others to measure your personal development or as a source of motivation to improve and, in the process, you develop a more positive self-image, comparisons can be beneficial. But comparison is typically more negative than positive because we tend to compare ourselves to people who seem or look prosperous in some way without thinking about anything other than their positive attributes.
So yes, sometimes comparisons can look or be harmless. Maybe it’s just scrolling through someone else’s highlight reel and noticing how much better their grades, clothes, or relationships seem.
But, slowly, it can turn into something more damaging: your own mind turning against you.
How? Because getting accustomed to comparison means nearly every time you achieve something you want — an award, a scholarship, a grade, etc. — instead of feeling proud, you immediately compare it to what someone else has accomplished. Consequently, you constantly self-sabotage by preventing yourself from enjoying your achievements.
You start doubting your worth, not because you failed, but because you convinced yourself someone else’s “better” makes your triumphs meaningless.
Just like an autoimmune disease doesn’t wait for an outside threat to cause damage, comparison doesn’t need anyone else to attack you; you’ll do it yourself.
But once your mind learns to attack itself, it won’t stop there. It starts going after everything else.
To be continued :)
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